It seems like there’s a new dating term or trend to learn every other week, from gophering and hardballing to…rizz? The latest that’s taking over TikTok? Beige flags, or traits in a partner (or potential partner) that are neither good nor bad but might cause you to do a double take. We caught up with Tinder’s resident relationship expert Devyn Simone for the 4-1-1 on how beige flags differ from red or green flags, plus why they’re trending in the first place.
Meet the Expert
Devyn Simone is a matchmaker and dating expert who is Tinder’s resident relationship expert. As a matchmaker and dating coach, Simone has interviewed more than two thousand singles as well as hundreds of happy couples to gain a deeper understanding of what unique challenges all of us face when we are dating in the age of technology and our new post-pandemic normal. Over the years she has analyzed that data and has developed a collection of best practices, tips, and easy-to-use formulas that help those dating with purpose find meaningful relationships.
What Are Beige Flags (& How Are They Different from Red and Green Flags?)?
You’re probably familiar with the concept of red flags and green flags, or dealbreakers and dealmakers in a relationship. (A red flag could be someone who’s rude to waiters at a restaurant while a green flag could be someone who is comfortable talking about their feelings.) According to Simone, “Beige flags are traits or habits that make you side-eye your partner.” She says the term describes quirky habits that aren’t necessarily dealbreakers, but they aren’t exactly something you’re seeking out in a romantic partner either. They’re neither good nor bad, just there—and potentially interesting. On TikTok, beige flags we’ve seen range from a boyfriend who lowers his voice a little every time he goes through a drive through (and is in complete denial about it) to a woman’s fiancé disliking silence during dinner so much that “he’ll Google ‘couples questions’ or ‘relationship quiz’ and ask me the most random yet intimate questions in a room full of people as if we’re in our own world.” (Some folks are even sharing their own beige flags, like a guy who fake proposes to his girlfriend every time they ask someone to take their picture.)